Just a little about me...

My description wasn't a joke, I really am a thirty-something married mormon who happens to be gay or bisexual, depending on your definition. I've pretty much known it since I was 14. Not quite normal, but pretty good at playing the part most of the time. I wasn't always a mormon, given that I formally joined the church at 17 in the midwest. Endless crews of good looking missionaries and going to LDS seminary had the desired effect.

Like many midwestern natives, I grew up in a small town of around 4,000 people. My high school had around 350 students in 4 grades. It was an impossibility not to have people you knew waving at you as you biked/walked or drove down the roads. A nice place to grow up, though the entertainments were few outside of school activities. I had grandparents around, siblings, and pretty good parents. My growing up days were the 70's and 80's, so yes I can vividly remember real hippies, the beginning of MTV, avocado green appliances.

I graduated from high school in the late 80's, went to college at a liberal arts college, then went on an LDS mission. Afterwards, I made the cultural leap of moving to Utah, and have been here quite a while now. I finished my education at BYU, and a year later, got married. Now its a decade (plus) later, and I'm still in Provo, working for a living and dealing with the hand I've been dealt. In the last few years, that hidden aspect of my personality has come back with a vengeance, though it never really went away. My marriage has gotten tough, and my wife knows about this. Will my marriage survive? I can't answer that, but so far I stay for my children.

I think I'll start by telling a lot more details about my history, then move to current thoughts, worries and issues. I appreciate comments, and look forward to this being a way to relieve some stress.