I hate Father's day

Yesterday was awful. Church was back to the emotionally painful session. The last speaker, who is a pretty intelligent gal, talked about how painful the whole game of parenthood can be, and then bore into the "be a perfect father routine." Fatherhood is just sacrifice, by her definition. As I listened I was thinking "and we are supposed to find joy in all this?" I couldn't bear to stay after sacrament meeting.

I think I must be a rotten father. Not a single card or present from my kids or my wife. I cooked breakfast, I cooked lunch. I cleaned the house, and did laundry. The absence of any sort of traditional expression of love was just sort of shocking to me. Finally I just went outside and walked the dog, then played catch with my son. At one point, I felt like getting in the car and leaving.

Sometimes, life just sucks. Now I need to get my head back on the positive side.